I wanted to share this with the person who has lost any hope to see that change is possible. I am referring to the change in our outlook on ourselves. We must love ourselves. I believe, that is where inner peace and healing begins.

I knew for a fact that God allowed me to remain here on earth, but there were times when the reasons seemed very cloudy. I also knew that every one of us had struggles of some sort or another, but life had become very challenging for this one. For instance, say that you've been striving very hard for something and you are just beginning to see the fruits. Out of the blue, there's this feeling of insignificance trying to tell you to just give up, that you will never achieve. Don't listen. 

All of us have that weak inner self that is so much against our succeeding because it is scared, and until we learn to recognize that voice, it has won. There finally came a time, after 25 years and over 30 surgeries, that I came to realize this is it, and it's OK to be different. I am enough. 

My goals in writing this book are not only to share my story with accident victims, but also for the person who has not experienced a physical loss, yet emotionally they are overcome. Ever since the day I began sharing my story with people, it was as if I had been buttered up and frosted like an angel food cake. It seemed as if no one wanted to see me hurt any more than I had been already.

To them, Pam was such an over comer. What had yet to be witnessed though, was the anger inside, pushed down so deep that even I was not about to confront it. I was furious that this happened. Why me? Why not me was the question that I had to accept. I didn't come to a resolution for years.

The reactions of the panel were that my skating was good, but my thighs were too big. They went on to say that, with constant travel between shows, there'd be no time to repair costumes if the seams were split.

Years later I was an instructor for Jack La Lannes Health Spa. Guess what? No more heavy thighs! It was not the kind of job with a future though. Later on, I was hired as a prop maker for Warner Bros. Studios. I worked on such shows as Wonder Woman, Fantasy Island, Eight Is Enough... I also took jobs on my own, designing and constructing stain glass windows.

On the night of December 6th, 1978, while driving home I was broad sided by a truck. I fell into a coma and did not awaken for five weeks. Even though I did show slight signs of life, it still took me an additional five weeks to arrive at a state of awareness. Now that I'm awake, I have not stopped. Hurdle after hurdle might have slowed me down temporarily, but I knew there was a reason that I was still here. I even attempted to return to my old job at the studios, but was unable to keep up. Another hurdle...

I graduated from LIFE BIBLE College in 1989. The complete story is in my book, HOW I BECAME A FEARLESS WOMAN by Pamela Jansen, which will be available as of January 2009. Featured in the book, Fearless Women: Midlife Portraits by Nancy Alspaugh and Marilyn Kentz, photography by Mary Ann Halpin.

I speak to different groups about my story and how to never lose hope, or they will give in to that fear of defeat. Acting became a love of mine that I am not about to shake. I began studying in 2001 because, I realized... If I can't get there behind the camera, I'll get there in front!